Minigolf!!! I suck at it!!! Like in real life!!!

And a little something for the stewardess in all of you. Flight attendant. Whatever.

Question: When do you know it's time to re-evaluate your body image? When the sight of your nakedness kills a shark.

Woke up with a migraine and feel terrible. That's what I get from talking about headaches too much. Outside it looks like all hell is going to break loose soon. But I like thunderstorms and I hated the suffocating weather we had the last couple of days, so that's fine with me. I'll take an advil and go back to bed now.

Sad news. Atticus Finch is gone: Gregory Peck died today.

I'm so stupid, if I wasn't myself I'd find it funny. Slammed the car door shut with my left hand still inside the frame. Ouch. I hope I just sprained it, it hurts like hell. And I do definitely not need a broken hand right now. So if my next blog entries are really s l o w, that's because I've got to type everything one-handedly. 'Scuse me, while I go put a pack of frozen peas on my hand. If only I had a pack of frozen peas.

Just waiting for my brother to come and install my car radio. Disclaimer to the tune of "Independent Woman": I am perfectly capable of doing it myself, but I didn't want to go through the hassle at the radio store again. So I sent him :)

Why is it that fitness studios have such aggressive marketing techniques and sleazy salesguys? The last studio I went to also had this smarmy manager and I felt greasy days after I talked to him. And the reason I enrolled in my current studio was the decided lack of smarminess in the staff. Why am I asking this? Because the other day we filled out a postcard to win a Mini Cooper. Then somebody calls us telling us we won a "Wellness Day" at this fitness center. At this point we already were suspicious, since when Jule said: "I filled out nothing." the person on the other end of the line said: "Whatever." So me and Jule go there yesterday nevertheless and of course it's just a plug for the fitness center.

This annoys me. Why would you do that? Can't you call people and tell them: "Look, you didn't win, but you might want to try out the studio, we'll give you a free tour and free XY"?? It annoyed me even more, because the guy who tried to sell us a contract kept asking us why we were there. Hello? Duh?? You called us to invite us. We have no reason whatsoever to be here. But at least we got to look at his face when he asked me for my fitness level and I checked 90%. That threw him off track. And we got to use the solarium. It was a studio that offered free solarium use - and I must say, all members looked like it. I almost didn't go because I have no intention of ending up like a wrinkly monkey. But I am cheap and so I did :)

In case you are interested: Pictures of the BBQ extravaganza the other day.

I have a question. Why is it that when you hit your foot against something you always stub your little toe? Mine is black and blue by now. Also, I have blisters on my feet because I wore the wrong shoes yesterday. There's nothing worse than wearing shoes that hurt. Foot pain is one of the worst pains you can have in my opinion. If you don't have it you think: "Oh, how bad can it be" but once your feet hurt your whole being gets sucked into your feet and concentrates there. Maybe that's a woman thing because we tend to wear uncomfortable shoes.

Other than that it's probably migraine headache that tops the list. Additionally annoying because nobody takes it seriously. I always had migraines and people just don't believe you when you tell them you can't do anything because your head hurts. Plus, I've been listening to those people who say: "Don't take pills for everything rightaway, it'll pass". Bullshit. Pass, Schmass. If I don't take an aspirin rightaway at the vaguest onset of a headache I most certainly will end up with throbbing pain, throwing up all night, generally of no use to anyone.

But people who say that are the same people that claim vitamins are much more healthy when consumed "naturally" instead of in a pill. Why, might I ask? A vitamin is a vitamin, no matter where it came from. My opinion: If you feel bad and there is a known remedy, why on earth wouldn't you take it?

Other than that, I finished Dead Famous yesterday and thought it was quite entertaining. Now for (gulp) Infinite Jest.
I achieved 84,57% on the Secret Service Test. Maybe I should apply to MI6.

Choking the Chicken? Petting the Poodle?

Are you known for any of this? The 15 signs you might be can be found here. According to the man who brought you cornflakes.

Quick note: If there's no poseurs available but you'd like to leave some, it sometimes helps to refresh the page...

Sweat, baby, sweat

I should be doing lots of work right now but I've decided it's too hot and I'll go and swim first. My laptop is still not doing what it's supposed to do anyway and I have to sit in my room at the PC. The janitor's kids are riding their bikes in circles in front of my window. It drives me crazy.

What else?

I was thinking about doing the Atkins Diet, but I did some research and it looks like that's a pretty stupid idea. Especially as I don't particularly like tons of meat and cheese and I want my pasta! And it's a stupid idea. And you can die from it. Did I mention it's a stupid idea?

Entertainment situation:

• Reading Dead Famous, Infinite Jest still pending.
• Have apparently seen all episodes of Dr. Stefan Frank. (aka "Der Arzt, dem die Frauen vertrauen" or, internationally speaking "Stefan Frank, M.D. - The Doctor Women Trust").
• Only 11 more days until the new Harry Potter comes out, yay!

Just saw Pete's Dragon and I always have to cry when Elliott leaves...*sniff*

When we were barbecuing tonight we were accosted by the "barbecue patrol" who demanded ridiculous things of us. Ridiculous mostly because it was raining a little anyway, everything was wet and frankly there was no danger whatsoever of anything catching fire. They threatened to fine us 35 Euros (per person) if we a) didn't put legs on our barbecue b) weren't far enough from the trees c) didn't keep the fire down (which was a demand put to us while we were just lighting the fire - how they imagined us barbecuing things on a metre-high flame, I'll never guess) d) didn't stop taking their picture. So we composed a little song about them. It's in German and supposed to be sung to the tune of the Elephant Patrol in the Jungle Book:

Wenn die Grill-Patrouille naht

Und ich mir 'ne Pute brat

Droh'n sie Bußgeld an

Schraub ich Beine dran

Das ist mal 'ne gute Tat

Das ist mal 'ne gute Tat.

(hopp zwo drei vier, bleib im Takt zwo drei vier)

Wenn die Grill-Patrouille naht

Und ich mir ein Schnitzel brat

Brennt das Feuer wild,

Machst du dann ein Bild

Wird die Patrouille rabiat

Wird die Patrouille rabiat.

(hopp zwo drei vier, bleib im Takt zwo drei vier)

Wenn die Grill-Patrouille naht

Und ich mir 'ne Bratwurst brat

Bist du nah am Baum

Ist ihr Mund voll Schaum

Das ist mal ein guter Rat,

Das ist mal ein guter Rat.

(hopp zwo drei vier, bleib im Takt zwo drei vier)

Wenn die Grill-Patrouille geht

Ist es meistens schon zu spät

Wenn der Baum dann brennt

Die Patrouille rennt

Ich glaub, ich geh auf Diät

Ich glaub, ich geh auf Diät.

Hardly slept tonight. Need to go now and prepare things for Tinisch's "surprise" birthday picnic.